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職場中不可深交的五種人

在工作遇到困難的時候,滿腹牢騷是無濟於事的,要抱有正面的態度,著眼於有益的事情。清楚你的人生目標、使命及長遠計劃,列出一份你個人的成績及獲得的利益,每當你懷疑的時候,便拿來作參考。與抱有正面理想的人為伍,要避免問那些「為什麼」的問題,將焦點集中在工作上,學會心胸開闊。

    職場箴言:

    1)交淺言深者不可深交:

    初到公司,可以透過閒談而與同事溝通,拉近彼此之間的距離。但是有一種人,剛認識你不久,便把自己的苦衷和委屈一古腦兒地向你傾訴。這類人乍看是令人感動的,但他可能也同樣地向任何人傾訴,你在他心裡並沒有多大的份量。

    2)搬弄是非的「饒舌者」不可深交:

    一般來說愛道人是非者,必為是非人。這種人喜歡整天挖空心思探尋他人的隱私,抱怨這個同事不好、那個上司有外遇等等。長舌之人可能會挑撥你和同事間的交情,當你和同事真的發生不愉快時,他卻隔岸觀火、看熱鬧,甚至拍手稱快。也可能慫恿你和上司爭吵。他讓你去說上司的壞話,然而他卻添油加醋地把這些話傳到上司的耳朵裡,如果上司沒有明察,屆時你在公司的日子就難過了。

    3)惟恐天下不亂者不宜深交:

    有些人過分活躍,愛傳播小道消息,製造緊張氣氛。「公司要裁員」、「某某人得到上司的賞識」、「這個月獎金要發多少」、「公司的債務龐大」等等,弄得人心惶惶。如果有這種人對你說這些話,切記不可相信。當然也不要當頭潑他冷水,只需敷衍:「噢。是真的嗎?」

    4)順手牽羊愛佔小便宜者不宜深交:

    有的人喜歡貪小便宜,以為「順手牽羊不算偷」,就隨手拿走公司的財物,比如訂書機、紙張、各類文具等小東西,雖然值不了幾個錢,但上司絕不會姑息養奸。這種佔小便宜還包括利用公司的時間、資源做私事或兼差,總認為公司給的薪水太少,不利用公司的資源撈些外塊,心裡就不舒服。這種佔小便宜看起來問題不嚴重,但公司一旦有較嚴重的事件發生,上司就可能懷疑到這種人頭上。

    5)被上司列入黑名單者不宜深交:

    只要你仔細觀察,就能發現上司將哪些人視為眼中釘,如果與「不得志」者走得太近,可能會受到牽連,或許你會認為這太趨炎附勢。但有什麼辦法,難道你不擔心自己會受牽連而影響到晉陞嗎?不過,你縱然不與之深交,也用不著落井下石。

    避免深交,但需要與之溝通。

    當你新進公司時,應當表現得友善大方,主動與人交際。比如:邀請同事共進午餐或晚餐,尋找機會請教工作上的問題,借此表達你願意配合同事工作的善意。

    三五同事經常聚在一起,或去唱歌,或逛街看電影,或聚會玩牌,久而久之,情誼加深,有可能從此形成「小團體」。

    如果上司把你認為是小團體的一員而列入黑名單,你就倒霉了。一般說來,上司對小團體總是抱持著不信任的態度,對於小團體裡的人多有顧慮。

    首先,上司會認為小團體裡的人公私難分。如果提拔了圈內某個人,而與之較好的同事「哥兒們」可能會得到偏愛放縱,不僅對公司、事業不利,對其他員工也不公平。

    有些時候,上司擔心小團體裡的人「不忠誠」。經常聚在一起的人氣味相投,若上司對其中某個人批評或扣獎金,若其中某個人與別的同事發生矛盾,這幾人可能聯合起來對付上司,或影響公司團結。再說,即使上司想給其中某個人單獨獎勵或紅包,這個人很可能就會洩漏給圈內的朋友知道。很可能紅包不是每個人都有,其他同事若知道定會認為上司不公。

    以下簡單介紹一些處理人際關係的方法:

    1)故意顯露笨拙的一面,使對方產生優越感。

    比如說,時下的演員都以年輕貌美、頭腦聰明、歌藝佳、演技生動為優點,企圖在觀眾中塑造一種形象,提升優越感;殊不知,一個人面對比自己優秀的人,只會增加心中的挫折感,也就自然而然就產生了反感。根據這個原理,某些人為獲得知名度,故意表露自己的笨拙。在公司的同事、上司面前,故意表現出單純的一面,以其憨直的形象,激發他人的優越感,吃小虧而佔大便宜。而有的部屬不會隱藏自己的鋒芒,工作上處處表現得幹勁十足、能力超強,殊不知自己在無形中已惹來嫉妒和猜忌:「你行,你一人就能幹好,那還要我們幹什麼?」

    2)說些自己的私事,從而拉近彼此間的距離。

    開門未必一定要見山,一見面就談工作的事,鐵定會讓人反感。何妨暫時拋開主題,先談及共同的話題,或自己的繁雜瑣事,以求達到心靈的共鳴。如肯尼迪在爭奪總統席位的競選演說中,曾經輕描淡寫地說:「緊接著,我還要告訴各位一句話,我和我的妻子雖然贏得選戰,但我們希望能再生個孩子。」

    在公司與同事談及私事,可以增進彼此間的親切感。但是,私事並不包括隱私。如果你向別人洩漏自己的隱私,別人可能會以此為笑柄攻擊你。如果隨意談論及他人的隱私,他人也會對你表示不滿,並乘機報復。

    3)傾聽是你克敵制勝的法寶。

    一個時時帶著耳朵的人遠比一個只長著嘴巴的人討人喜歡。與人溝通時,如果只顧自己喋喋不休,根本不管對方是否有興趣聽。這是很不禮貌的事情,也極易讓人產生反感.

    做一個好聽眾,不僅要自己說,更要尊重別人說,效果比你說得天花亂墜好得多。傾聽並不只是單純的聽,而應真誠地去聽,並且不時地表達自己的認同或讚揚。傾聽的時候,要面帶微笑,最好別做其他的事情,應適時的以表情、手勢如點頭表示認可,以免給人敷衍的印象。

    特別是當對方有怨氣、不滿需要發洩時,傾聽可以緩解他人的敵對情緒。很多人氣憤的訴說,並不一定需要得到什麼合理的解釋或補償,而是需要把自己的不滿發洩出來。這時候,傾聽遠比提供建議有用得多。如果真有解釋的必要,也要避免正面衝突,而應在對方的怒氣緩和後再進行。

    4)縮小彼此間的心靈距離。

    人與人之間總維持著一定的距離,以建立藩籬保護自己又同時避免傷害對方。雖說「距離產生美感」,但距離太遠,就會產生隔閡。根據接近原則,可以縮小距離,使之恰到好處。

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